A Lifetime
by Jing Mei Chen
Summary: Jing Mei and Carter hash it out about their "incidents" and Jing mei's true feelings about Abby


Title: A Lifetime  
rating: pg (language)  
warning: angst??  
category: pure Jinter  
Summary: Deb and Carter finally hash it out about their "incidents"   
and Deb's true feelings about Abby!  
  
OOC- Jinter interaction! Jinter interaction! *does little dance   
around the computer* Jinter interaction!!!!!!  
  
  
Allie woke up 8AM  
Graduation day.  
Got into a car,  
And crashed along the way.  
  
When we arrived late to the wake,  
Stole the urn while they   
Looked away,  
And drove to the beach  
'Cause I knew you'd want it  
That way.  
  
*********************************************  
  
"John!" She ran after him,"john!!"  
  
"Go away Deb!" he called back behind him  
  
Deb froze in her spot,her arms hung at her side,"What did I do?"  
  
"I don't need this,ANY of this!"  
  
"What did I DO, John?"  
  
Carter took a deep breath,"It's not you,Deb"  
  
"Don't give me that shit"  
  
"Deb"  
  
"But it's all about Abby,right??I saved your fucking life,John"  
  
His face dropped to the darkened ground,"I know"  
  
************************************************  
And you were standing  
On the hood of the car  
Singing out loud  
When the sun came up.  
  
And I know I wasn't right,  
But it felt so good.  
And your mother didn't mind,  
Like I thought she would.  
And that REM song was playing   
In my mind.  
And three and a half minutes  
Felt like a lifetime  
***************************************************  
"I even forgave you for not coming to me in your time of need,even   
though I came to you for support!"  
  
He nodded slowly,"I said I was sorry"  
  
"This isn't a friendship"  
  
Carter looked up,startled,"Deb?"  
  
She shook her head and continued walking to the parking structure.  
  
"Deb!"  
  
Deb kept walking , listening to the pounding of his feet behind her  
  
"Deb!"  
  
"How's it feel John?" Deb turned around to watch his face  
  
"I don't understand"  
  
"YOU chased after me this time." the anger slowly dissolved from   
Deb's voice,"YOU were confused and scared,you didn't know what you'd   
done wrong"  
  
Carter swallowed hard  
  
"It was wrong of me to drag Abby into this"  
  
"Deb...."  
  
"I don't hate her.At times I resent her,only because you give her   
your full attenion" Deb turned her face to the sky  
  
"Stop"  
  
"Why John??" Deb crossed her arms over her chest,"So you can work   
your charm and tell me from now on we're going to the best of   
friends??"  
*************************************************************  
It felt like a lifetime  
  
And you move like water  
I could drown in you.  
And I fell so deep once,  
Till you pulled me through  
  
You would tell me  
"No one is allowed to be so proud  
They never reach out  
When they're giving up."  
  
***************************************************************  
"What do you want me to say Deb!" he cried out suddenly,making her   
jump  
  
She shook her head  
  
"If you don't tell me,how can I make things okay??"  
  
A tear slid down her cheek,"You should know"  
  
"I'm sick of SAYING I'M SORRY!" Carter yelled,"Ever since I came back   
from Atlanta,all I've been doing is apologizing!!"  
  
Deb nodded  
  
"But I'm sorry I hurt you" he said gently,"I regret Rena and spilling   
my guts to Abby..it came back to haunt me by the look on your   
face.But I'm sincerely sorry for causing you pain"  
  
She closed her eyes as tears slid down her cheeks  
  
"I should have been there for you,instead of..." Carter's voice shook  
  
"Instead of?" Deb walked slowly towards him  
  
"Focusing on me"  
  
She bit her lip  
  
"Trying to fulfill all the stuff I thought I had lost"  
  
"Like?"  
  
Carter shook his head violently,"No,I'm not doing this"  
  
Deb caught his eye,"John?"  
  
"Close intimate relationships" he looked away from her,"Friendships"  
  
"A partner?"  
  
He looked up at her,surprise in his eyes,"A partner"  
********************************************************  
And I know I wasn't right,  
But it felt so good.  
And your mother didn't mind,  
Like I thought she would.  
And that REM song was playing   
In my mind.  
And three and a half minutes  
Felt like a lifetime  
  
Are you sitting in the lights?  
Or combing your hair again,  
And talking in rhymes?  
Are you sitting in the lights?  
  
When I got home, heard the phone,  
Your parents had arrived.  
And your dad set his jaw  
Your mom just smiled and sighed.  
  
****************************************  
  
"You mean like no one wanting to date a woman who gave up her child   
from a one night stand for adoption?"  
  
Carter studied her face quietly,"Deb?"  
  
"Instead of going inwards,I reached out for a friend" Deb took a deep   
breath,"But I understand why you weren't there"  
  
"I didn't know" Carter said quietly  
  
Deb reached out for his hand,"I didn't know you were hurting either"  
  
"But that's how I wanted it"  
  
"Me,too"  
****************************************************  
But they left soon  
And I went to my room.  
Played that disc that you'd given me,  
And I shut my eyes  
Swear I could hear the sea.  
  
When we were standing  
On the hood of your car  
Singing out loud when the sun came up.  
  
And I know I wasn't right,  
But it felt so good.  
And your mother didn't mind,  
Like I thought she would.  
And that REM song was playing  
In my mind.  
And three and a half minutes,  
Three and a half minutes,  
  
Felt like a lifetime.  



End file.
